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1999 Saturday, January 14, 2006

Posted by kairin in poet.
1 comment so far
somewhere in 1999. i wrote this in the book.

This i wrote that night
~ | ~

once again i felt, a feeling
deep inside which i thought,
was lost beyond and gone.
that feeling i know, i felt before.
(on 4th oct that wee morning)

was it the love of the story?
was it the love in my life?
was it that feeling i feared was lost,
forever?

i wanted to cry, i wanted to let go.
there were thing i felt tonite
things i knew & felt was right.
it wasn’t sadness that was deep in me.

it wasn’t fear that i cry
but a knowing, a knowing
that i have this feeling
that burns deep inside.

i have once cherished what i felt
i have once felt,
why i desire, the moment i fear
may be lost forever.

once again dear self,
i let you feel this feeling.
its a feeling of longing
a feeling to be free

your eyes are burning with tears
its not sadness, i know
its love for that someone you cared
its belief that all live is shared.

dear self i know this is true.
that feeling is cold, it burns.
it may burn right through you
all i see is myself, all i see is you.

life is life everlasting
remember this feeling
don’t let it burn right through you.

a lazy confession Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Posted by kairin in working life.
3 comments

Having wrote this much, what am I going on about? I’m 24, about to graduate, currently experiencing what could be my future career, whilst wondering if I’m able to secure other more promising/rewarding options. At the same time, I’m drawing as much lessons as possible from the experience of others to make the most suitable decision (i don’t think this is a black/white matter).

as i read his entry, it dawned unto me that i am missing out something. or rather. i misplaced something. i am turning 24 in a month’s time. and i’ve yet to secure a job. worse, i have no idea where i am heading to, which explains why i’ve not secured a job.

as much as i wanted to, i have to admit the number of companies i’ve sent out my resume are small. to the extent that it is almost… nil. so much for trying my best. and it has already been more than a month that i do not have any mode of income streaming in. i’ve planned to get myself working on my resume, but as of the moment, my resumes are still the same as the last one i’ve done up in december 2005. i guess i am lacking something hence the lack of any positive replies on my resumes. guess its back to the drawing board? perhaps. first real post in 2006 and i’m already whining.

way to go.

:: edited :: on another note however, moss called me up to see how i was doing. and he reminded me that he might be able to offer me some help in getting a job. however i’m missing some important skills.

microsoft office skills. as much as i’d like to think i’m pretty good at it, in all honesty, i just suck. i can use word and excel on most stuffs. but i really need to work on learning MS Access. yeah, that database creation software. i feel so duh.

so i decide that i ought to go down to the local library nearby and pick myself a book on access, something i can pick up and learn fast. oh well. here goes~!